Cold as ice cream, still as sweet.

Date: Sunday, June 28, 2009
Time: 9:18 pm

Goodbye my old friend :)

This blog has been with me for nearly 3 years, and has seen me through many ups and downs. From carefree times to life changing events, my blog has been there for me.

I'm not the same person I used to be 3 years ago, many parts of me as a person has changed since then. When I see through my old posts, I can't really believe I actually wrote those thoughts, and how shallow I used to be.

I'm still keeping this blog, because it holds a large part of my secondary school life. I have made my fair share of regrets during that part of my life, and also many triumphs I will always be proud of 10, 30 years down the road.

That part of my life is over, and I need a new place to grow as a person. To discover who I want to be and the bumps along the way. I have a compulsive urge to compartmentalize certain aspects of my life, as you can see.

It's time for a new start.
Thank you for being here with me through times when I felt no one was with me. But I need a new space, neutral territory, as it were.

Final curtain call, so go ahead and take a bow because you deserve it :)

UPDATE

My new space :

wallflowertimes.wordpress.com

Date: Friday, June 26, 2009
Time: 9:30 pm

Alone time is the best time for me :)

School hols extended for another week. I know I don't sound as enthusiastic as I should be sounding. After all, which student in their right minds shudder at the thought of another week of sweet freedom right? Well, not when you have e-learning to deal with.

I spent the past 2 weeks actually relaxing, and not spending so much time stressing over tutorials, or my school schedules. It felt good actually, to wake up and know I'm going to spend the day lazing in front of the telly watching recorded TV shows, or to be able to go for a swim as and when I feel like it. Reducing a little of the pressure I put on myself for 2 weeks, really freed me up :)

But well, reality strikes in from next week onwards. Until the next break I suppose (Gosh, I'll prolly end up a nut case by then.)
........................

Went to visit my aunt at mount E just now; she finally delivered baby Adam. I now have 5 kid cousins under the age of 5 to irritate me now :D Hahahah
But it's worth it, with their cheeky smiles and laughter. Reminds me to take things, and myself, less seriously sometimes.
........................

Well, I'm dead beat right now, and still have loads of tutorials and projects left to complete :(
Many things on my mind right now, things I'd rather not talk about here.
Goodnight, and sleep tight :)

Date: Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Time: 10:46 am

My stomach is sick, and it's all in my head

I'm in school now, supposed to be doing my part in the HTML project, but here I am blogging.
Procrastination is one of my specialties, huh?

The 2 week hols are about to end, and I still have many plans and projects I haven't completed :(
Nothing academically productive was achieved yesterday due to a Mr.Brightside effect. You know, when I felt so sick and tired (literally) that I pretty much collasped in bed for the day. And yes, the song's lyrics were playing through my head the entire time.

Dad's birthday is coming up. I already know what to get for him, but I don't dare to go peninsula on my own to do so :/ I find the atmosphere and people there are kind of intimidating. Damn chickenshit right?

Well, I have to return to my HTML project. Byezxzx

Date: Sunday, June 21, 2009
Time: 2:00 pm

Phuket

Random shot of cows.

I know it's sort of unexpected to put a picture of cows, instead of the sparkling beaches most would associate with Phuket. I took this photo when I went biking with my brother, a few kilometres off from the hotel where we were staying. We had to wait for a good 10 mins to allow the cows to clear the road for us to pass. This would probably rank among the top 10 most random moments in my short life.

The beach I went to, mai khao and kata were not as crowded as patong, and the waters were much cleaner and bluer than patong :)

So basically, my 3 days in thailand were spent stuffing my face with thai food, laying on the beach/by the pool, and watching white people turn red. Yup, sums it all up.

And before I forget, Happy father's day, Dad. I love you :)

Date: Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Time: 6:52 pm

What holidays?

Spent a day in school doing stats and trying to complete Effcom speech outline.
I could only get another main point done today, falling short of my goal of actually finishing the outline. But nevermind, I had fun joking with some of my friends and classmates who had to come back for group meetings for their project works.

Recently I have also been playing my guitar more often. Even though I'm actually really bad at it, and can only play some chords here and there, I find it really therapeutic :D Even if I sing out of tune, and my strumming sounds like a dying cat I feel much better afterwards. Especially after playing taylor swift's songs. Yes, as you can see, I used to be a closet taylor swift fan. Even though the only song I know how to sing is "you belong with me", and I can't even remember the full song. (The bridge gets to me)
Maybe the correct term would be closet "you belong with me" fan.

I have to show you this video of this dude, rob high fiving everyone in the subway. I showed it to geraldine, jeannette, lenny and zhijiuan today, and we burst out laughing. I WANT TO DO THIS IN SINGAPORE TOOOOOO!!!!!!! Anyone wants to stake out at the city hall mrt during morning rush hour with me to high 5 random strangers :D hahaha

WOOH THAILAND IN 2 DAYS TIME!!!

And I need to get new earpieces. Shit happens when you get lousy no name ones I guess :/
Okay, byezxz.
Will update when I have new stuff to share :D

Date: Sunday, June 14, 2009
Time: 6:12 pm

I'm going to be okay :)

The past week has been a real shit one, but I'm going to put it all behind me now :D Thanks to my lovely classmates and the people who care for being there for me when I was down in the dumps.

The 2 week term breaks are here, and so is my highly anticipated phuket trip, which would involve me trying to stuff my face with as much phad thai as I can. So when school starts, you'll prolly can't recognize me because I'll be a red sunburnt blob ._. HAHAHAH
These 2 weeks are not a holiday per se because I still have group projects to do and revision for my modules to start on. I need to improve on AFA :( Not too happy with my results, so I'm going to have to work on that. I know I can do better.

And and of course, outings with friends from poly and sec school to attend ^^ Yaynessssss

So those are my plans for the next 2 weeks. I hope I can make it through after the term break and finish the semester in one piece.

Date: Thursday, June 11, 2009
Time: 9:09 am

I was going through my photos in my hard drive just now, and found these in in my art folder. They're old pictures of my family, the oldest dating back to the 1930s. I don't know why, but I just feel relaxed looking at them whenever I'm stressed about life or feeling down. It's a culmulation of happy memories of people I have never met, but am still linked to.

Like somehow, my troubles don't seem to be as permanent as they did before.

And that when I look back, I don't want to remember or be remembered for only the sad or unhappy things in my life.

Thinking about how happy I could be, makes me happy already :)

UPDATE:

Heheheheh I feel tons better now. Thanks to Jeannette for lending a ear :) I'll probably return to normal ( was I ever really?) tomorrow or something. Thanks also to people who had to deal with my emo-ness, either my weird/erratic MSN behaviour or in real life moodiness.

I feel so much more relieved. Tomorrow is definitely going to be a better day :D

Date: Tuesday, June 09, 2009
Time: 8:16 am

I cleared my stats paper yesterday without a hitch. I should do okay if not for any miscalculations or careless mistakes.

Went to chomp chomp all the way in serangoon gardens for dinner yesterday with the classmates. The food reminded me of family vacations to malaysia, where dad would order the greasiest food from a hole in the wall stall (He seems to always know where the good ones are) and the entire family would proceed to stuff their faces with it. Hahaha.
Reached home at 10 thereabouts, dead tired but happy with the day spent with good company :)

........................

This is a general topic not directed at anyone, just something I was pondering about one day on the way to school.

I remember once a story someone told me, about a young man who was so obsessed with his beauty that he was cursed by the gods and turned into a white flower by the side of his pond.

The moral of the story, about the pitfalls of narcissism and the tendancy of people to judge soley on external appearance stuck to me, and I always always try my best not to judge people who are deemed unconventional by others although sometimes I falter, and let slip a few comments unintentionally. After all, I am only human and do have my own short comings. I can admit that I'm not perfect, but I try my best to be non judgemental of other's looks or character. Because I know how it feels to be judged just because you look slightly different from everyone else, and it is not something I would want to wish on anyone, ever.

Sigmund Freud has his theories on narcissism, that some extent of it is essential for our self preservation. But it's a very fine line he's drawing between high self esteem and plain narcissism.
Don't you think so?

........................

Anyways, I have to get ready for school now, so I'll end my ramblings here. Bye :)

Date: Saturday, June 06, 2009
Time: 7:49 pm

Isn't there like a test next week, and you're still going out?

Today met my bandies and meibing and went to tampines for the day. It was a nice opportunity to see everyone and catch up on each other's lives. The humid weather gave me a dizzy spell that lasted for a good part of the day :( Damn I hate global warming.

The malls at tampines, such as the spanking new tampines 1 and tampines mall were jammed packed with families and screaming kiddos, so I think I'm going to make my next trip- if I ever get around to making another- on a school day instead. I was nice to meet meibing, and she lent her ever patient listening ear to me today :) Making stupid jokes and taking silly pics are always the highlight of every bandies outing, and I'm really glad I dragged myself out of the house to meet everyone today. Totally not wasted.

Must revise for Stats and do MicroE tutorial now. Bye~

Date: Thursday, June 04, 2009
Time: 7:33 pm

Friday always comes too late

I swear the stuff in my room is slowly falling apart bit by bit. I sat on my swivel chair today, and landed on the floor instead ._. I sat there stunned for 5 seconds, before bursting into laughter. I don't fully understand why I did that though.

Today was relatively normal, apart from the somewhat failed gyming session which focused on weights. The dragonboaters present and guys from my class were lifting 10/12/17.5 kg weights with no problem while I was struggling with the 2/4 kg dumbells. Talk about a hit on the self esteem. But then again, I was never the type capable of lifting anything above the weight of a remote control, so I shouldn't be complaining too much about my own lack of arm strength. Hahaha :)

I plan to finish the class tee by this weekend hopefully? We'll see how it goes. It'll be the confirm most kick ass tee :D I need to keep in touch with my pencils and sketches.

Meeting bandies (CONFIRM THIS TIME) for breakfast and meibing on saturday for starbucks :D And is it just me who feels that friday always comes too late every week?

Thursday is such a drag.

Date: Monday, June 01, 2009
Time: 8:10 pm

How was your day? Mine was...

I can't believe I spent a good part of my weekends fretting over POM when it turned out to be...nothing -.-

Spent a good part of the day with JJ, John, Julius and Rachel slacking in the library. And also showing off my horrible tai-ti skills. Awesome shit cause I did okay for the 1st game and went pretty much downhill after that :D I don't know why I used the smiley for, but who cares. Had thai food and great company for dinner, before trudging home and stoning infront of my laptop.

AND AND AUNGHTET AND DAVID RACHEL ARE COMING NEXT WEEK! WOOH YAYNESSSSS~

Okay I must do my econs tutorial before tomorrow, or else I'll be completely blur when PLS goes through them in class. Bye y'all :D